Friday, October 12, 2012

Family – Times Two, Part Three

part 3 of 3

Okay, perhaps you have guessed how the story ends. You are probably right but there are a few unknown twists and turns. The main point of this series: forging forever families, whether with birth or adoptive children and family members. That adoption is an amazing way to form one’s family. And that in the end, forgiveness and love are what matters.

This series has comedy and quirky moments, a theme song or two, many other family-oriented storylines and more and special moments that were undeniable life lessons. One of the translated titles is Unexpected You—quite descriptive of what happens in losing a child, finding a child, finding a child in an orphanage (or foster care!), and finding room for a child in one’s heart. Even finding the courage to decide to parent. Sometimes the prospect of loving beyond the borders of one’s life brings an “unexpected you”. Unexpected love. Unexpected parent or child. Unexpected other family. Unexpected life.

Reflecting on how many “unexpected you” youth wait in foster care—whether in group homes or foster homes, who dare to dream of a forever family, a forever home, I think the elements of this drama didn’t just make for good television (whatever the language), it makes for great perspective!

I agree--58 whole episodes with subtitles is a lot to tackle. It’s not Downton Abbey but it had special charm for me. Since adoption is a major topic in my life, I allowed myself the luxury of watching. I realize that all adopted children experience Family—Times Two, whether or not they ever meet or live with their birth family. I learned things about myself and my own angst. I know our daughter is in touch with her birth family. I know she had enjoyed coming to know them. I know she exhibits Nature a lot (although sometimes—rather unexpectedly—Nurture finds its way in, too). I applaud her because I also know that she works hard not to pit one of her families against the other. So I work hard not to feel intimidated that she has two families. This drama taught me to celebrate even the unexpected in adoption. To not be afraid to wear blue jeans, a plaid shirt and vest—to be comfortable, casual and so myself, no matter that she has family, times two—when we are together I let her know how happy I am to see and be with my daughter.

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